I continue to be amazed at things I'm hearing over the airwaves. One of the best sources of really crazy things that actually happen is "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me," one of my favorite NPR shows. I listen to it while I'm walking and more than once I've kind of doubled up laughing at the stupid things people do.
Wait, wait, now that I think of it, passing cars can't know that I'm doubled up in laughter and not in pain...and not once has anyone stopped to ask if I'm in distress. Where's the humanity? The Good Samaritan? Probably texting or blue-toothing.
But, I digress. If you're not familiar with "Wait, Wait" it's a game show format that has three panelists (usually comedians and journalists) and folks can call in and interact with them, answering current event-type questions. At times, Peter Sagal, the erudite host, asks the panelists questions; correct answers get points and at the end of the show the panelist with the most points wins absolutely nothing.
More often than not, one of the questions has to do with a research project. Today's research involved sex and rats. Apparently, male rats are more likely to engage in sexual activity with female rats that are wearing - and I am not making this up - sexy vests.
WHAT? So many questions spring to mind...
What kind of vest makes a rat look sexy? Does it have sequins? Does it have a push up bra with multiple cups for all the rat teats? Is there a Fredrick's of Sewers that produces and markets these sexy vests?
What are the researchers trying to prove? That rats are as superficial as humans? Can you imagine a researcher telling his/her parents - who have probably forked over a lot of dough to fund their education - that sexy vests on rats is their field of study?
Who is funding this research? No, wait, wait. I don't want to know.
Finally, who gives a rat's ass (!) if male rats are attracted to female rats in a bustier? Personally, the less I know about the mating habits of rats the better. I have my own mating habits that require my attention.
Seriously. There are far more serious situations in the world that need our best scientific minds.
Then there's these Burger King commercials where adult chickens are having a sex talk with their kids about where chicken fries come from. They have great tag lines...
"Don't forget the condiments" and "Don't ever double dribble."
I realize this makes me look like a 14-year old boy, but they make me laugh.
Finally, there's a series of commercials about Hannah and her Horse and I have no idea what it's hawking because at the end of the commercial the horse stars talking in this very British voice about something completely unrelated to the product, like how it's so much more difficult for him - the horse - to walk because he has four legs and has to mentally think about which leg goes first.
Some advertising firms are getting paid a lot of money to be quite inane. I could do that. And for a lot less money. And I just happen to have quite a bit of time on my hands.
As you can plainly see.
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